Jaheez

I seem to never be getting online on my laptop at the moment and when i do, its for a really short amount of time and then, before you know it, i am back under my duvet and i am hiding. That is all i seem to do; hide. I hide from my reflection, i have taken down the mirrors that aren't avoidable and the rest of them, i do not look into until i have to, like when i am putting my makeup on. I am scared of the people that are scared of me. Who can blame them though? Who can blame anybody for being afraid when they witness my eyes darting around the room, my hands shaking, voice trembling and me dropping things all over the place. People need to be more aware of anxiety and how to deal with it. I just need acceptance. I am absolutely convinced that with acceptance, everyone would be fine and dandy. All it takes is for you to accept yourself and then, in turn, others will do the same.

I hate how i write. ARGH

I need to get off to bed really. I have to be up at seven so that i am ready to go on over to my friends at ten in the morning. Then, we are taking her kids to meet their grandparents and then going shopping.
I have been really well-behaved with my money this week and i am going to try my best to put some into my savings account. I need to get back into this saving fund shite again. Its been really going down recently and i just need to make sure that i get it back up as soon as possible.

I bought a bright red hair dye today and i have dyed my hair. I have not yet looked in the mirror because i am finding that a little too much of a traumatic thing to do at the moment

Hmm. I better go to bed. It is too late to take my Tamazepam now, i am pissed off. I am going to have a shitto night, sleepwise. SO annoying.
<3 <3 <3